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Higher Voltage Character Battle: Fagmort of the Millennium |
Those Forgotten by History’s Indifferent Gaze
Picking one-hundred and twenty-eight fighting game characters out of the hundreds and thousands that have been created over the years is no mean feat.
Here’s a couple of HerV-Towers’ more hotly-contested rejects.
Seth
Seth’s omission was an honest-to-god oversight on our part. As one of SNK’s most awesome characters, we have no doubt that this He-Vanessa would have cut a mohawk-shaped swath through his opponents. Rump! Rump! Raaa!
Adon
Adon vs. Joe is an all-time classic concept, one that comes up whenever the topic of Capcom fighters vs SNK ones is brought up. So natually we didn’t bother including him. Er, sorry. At least Joe lost.
Brocken
The thought of M.Bison having sex with Inspector Gadget whilst Heinreich Himmler watches from the sidelines in a red velvet smoking jacket is horrendous enough … but having to actually play as the offspring of such an encounter? No thank you.
Lin
Poison-blooded, yellow, floating, leg-wobbling ninja, who would have been included had he not been the worst fighting game character of all time.
Senator (Eternal Champions)
“Scathing parody of senator Lieberman”, apparently - can impale his foes on the Washington Monument. Nobody had heard of him except S-U-P-E-R, so don’t be surprised if you see “HERV R FAGS” written in the toilets at E3.
More than usual, we mean.
Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen
The Olsen twins made their fighting game debut in “Mary-Kate and Ashley’s Karate Khaos” for the Gameboy Color. Fortunately the time span between the game being concieved and it being cancelled was so short, it technically never actually existed. Shame.
Bridget
Christie
Whether she’s glowering in the combat arena or on the volleyball court, Dead or Alive’s Christie is a gorgeous, marvellous-realised character, who’s appearance in the character battle was cut at the last minute, when we realised she’s just a platinum blonde wig and a pair of tits.
Kushnood Butt
What a wasted oppurtunity.
Brian Battler
Only joking.
