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Review: Fatal Fury (Sega Genesis) |
Am I destined to relentlessly hunt down and review Fatal Fury games? Am I being punished? Let me clear this up, right away. Sometimes taking a stroll down memory lane involves tumbling down and breaking a leg or something. In other words, nostalgia is great and all, but it could very well kill you. How so? Good grief, man! Play Fatal Fury. Don’t bother letter bombing me either, consider this review a fair warning.
I was able to play this game emulated on Dreamcast, through, well, questionable means. But the point is, I played on a TV, with a controller, so consider this review a loving tribute to the golden era when you’d park your small kiester in front of the cathode box for hours of endless fun with your copy of Fatal Fury for Genesis. Now, speed up a few years later, I’m 17,
sitting in front of the TV, playing an old relic of video game history. I cried later realizing how sad a life I lead.
My! It starts off with quite a bang too, since you can only choose 3 characters. The heroes we’ve become so familiar with, Terry, Andy and a rather prunish looking Joe Higashi. His character art in this game is simply digital comedy. You’ll be embarking upon a historical mission to put the cap on Geese Howard, the man who murdered Andy and Terry’s father. Flex those muscles boys! Because to finish this game, you’ll need to use those muscles to freakin’ cheese all your enemies to death.
If a fair fight ever crossed your mind while playing this game, it certainly isn’t going to be in the 1 player mode. Keep in mind that the enemies are too busy wonking around the stage, giving you their impression of a deflating German zeppelin. Why is that? Because this game uses the oh-so fabulous two lane fighting system. You have the top lane and bottom lane.
You can switch between the two should you want, while launching an attack that never seems to connect. Oh yes. You see, the CPU opponent never misses a hit, and usually out-prioritizes your feeble cross-lane attack. I found it a more sound strategy to stick to a lane, and wait for the flying flesh wad to swing is way to you where you just trample with a low kick upon arrival. In fact, that’s pretty much the way this game is played. You take advantage of the repetitious AI. It’ll keep falling for the same trick over and over again. Against Geese, I kept calling in a power wave as he was about to land in front of me. Shake, stir, repeat. It’s like shampoo, only less bubbly.
The controls are a real headache within themselves. I hope you have strong fingers, because you’re gonna have to really mash out those movements. Don’t bother using finesse here, just apply your forehead to the controller, and shake it. See if a move comes out. Your character has a small arsenal of moves that damage the opponent in an appropriate amount, which is great, because the fights don’t last very long in this game. It’s not uncommon to see a match end within 10 seconds. Get in there, land a few special maneuvers, and the other guy is left weeping on the floor. It’s a gripe, but a godsend as well since it lets you move on to the next fight all the much quicker.
Not all is bad though, SNK gave us a break here by having small cut scenes between fights, which is great, because I love seeing Geese’s henchmen grabbing Terry while screaming out, “Dude!”. It’s classic, it brought a tear to my eye, and I’m going
to probably grope myself every time I have to see it again. The anticipation is just ace, m’right?
Not really. You’ll let this turd sit in the attic a bit longer after playing it. If not for the dramatic dialogue, but then for the stupendous sound. The genesis has never been a sound maestro, but some tunes in this game irritate. Others are soothingly enjoyable and upbeat. Duck King’s little ditty comes to mind. But I forgot what it sounds like soon after. Well, it’s there, but I guess you won’t remember very long afterwards anyway. Oh, everybody grunts as well in the game. Which is really great! Seriously!
There’s not much else to cover about this game that I haven’t already said. If you play it again sometime, you’ll see why the classics of the fighting genre are a touchy subject. They’re a great conversation piece, but good lord you wouldn’t want to be caught playing some of ‘em.
